HEALTHY CHAPS
  • School Based Therapists
  • About Us
  • Blog
  • Calm Room
  • Challenge Success
  • Community Resources
  • Contact Us
  • Academic Counseling
  • Nurses' Clinic
  • Nutrition & Wellness
  • Social Emotional Learning (SEL)
  • Speaker Series
  • Speaker Series - Handouts/Videos
  • Stress Management
  • Study Skills & Tips
  • Substance Abuse Prevention & Intervention
  • Quick Report
  • Healthy Chaps PSA Contest

Six Daily Questions to Ask Yourself While Social Distancing

4/22/2020

 
Picture
An appropriate and helpful article from Mindful.org

As the COVID-19 pandemic spreads, and efforts to “flatten the curve” through physical distancing intensify, many of us find ourselves quarantined at home. The physical isolation and sudden departure from familiar routines can be jarring and disorienting. Settling in for the possibility of an extended shelter-in-place order, I wrote these six “Daily Quarantine Questions” to help me structure my days—and check in with myself, to make sure I’m doing OK. After I shared them on social media, I heard from thousands of people who said that these resonated for them.

Before getting into the questions, I want to recognize that not everyone has the privilege to shelter in place, or to do so safely and with financial security. Health care, grocery, transit, and other essential workers are on the frontline of caring for us, often putting themselves and their families at great risk. Thank you. You deserve not just our gratitude and solidarity, but adequate protective equipment and hazard pay. Many gig and freelance workers like myself, together with small business owners, are suddenly out of work (check out these resources in California). Our unhoused neighbors have nowhere to go. Our incarcerated relatives are also at great risk.

May we remember that it is a privilege to even be safely sheltered at home and asking these questions.

1. What am I grateful for today?
Last month, I heard recently-freed Puerto Rican political prisoner Oscar López Rivera speak at UC Berkeley. Someone asked how he survived 36 years in prison, 12 in solitary confinement. López Rivera responded that every morning he sang Violeta Parra’s song (later popularized by Mercedes Sosa) “Gracias a la Vida” (thank you to life). Our incarcerated family have much to teach us about how to survive extended physical and social isolation, including cultivating a daily gratitude practice, even in the most cruel of conditions. What are you grateful for today? Take two minutes every day to make a list. Add to it throughout the day.

2. Who am I checking in on, or connecting with, today?
As many have rightly reframed it, it’s not social distance we need, but rather social solidarity while we maintain physical distance. Pick three people each day to check in on. Call your grandma. FaceTime your mom. Text your friends (but not your ex!). Check on the neighbors. If you have more to give, the Disability Justice Culture Club is pairing minimally risk-exposed allies with disabled people of color and elders in the San Francisco East Bay who need extra support. Similar mutual-aid networks exist elsewhere.

3. What expectations of “normal” am I letting go of today?
We’re facing down a global pandemic. The nightly news is the stuff of nightmares. Whole states are on lockdown. You’re suddenly either out of work or working from home while simultaneously running a homeschool for rebellious “coworkers” and frantically disinfecting surfaces. It’s OK if you don’t get to inbox zero by the end of the workday. It’s OK if the kids don’t learn anything today, but are still loved and alive by bedtime. Figure out what is actually important to you in this moment and focus on that. Science fiction novelist Octavia Butler, who wrote about resilience and adaptation in dystopian times, tells us, “The only lasting truth is Change.” The faster we let go of expectations of “normal,” the faster we adapt.

4. How am I getting outside today?
Nature, fresh air, and sunshine are good for our nervous systems. While not all of us may be able to get to the redwoods or the ocean, simply leaving the house is helpful. Can you sit in the sun for 10 minutes? Step outside briefly to see the moon as it rises? Even if you cannot physically get outside, can you open a window for fresh air? Or bring flowers inside?

5. How am I moving my body today?

Crisis heightens fear and anxiety. The more we can shift out of our heads and into our bodies, the more grounded we’ll feel. Take a 10-minute walk around the block. Run the stairs in your building. Do five push-ups. If you have limited mobility or fitness, can you roll your ankles in a circle while seated? Massage the tension out of your jaw? Put a hand on your heart to feel its beat?

6. What beauty am I creating, cultivating, or inviting in today?
Beauty is a powerful antidote to despair. Recognizing the beauty in the world and bringing it into our lives is an affirmation of the life that still exists and is worth fighting for. Becoming creators, not just consumers, of culture gives us agency and power. Grace Lee Boggs, the late philosopher and social activist from Detroit, taught us that “a revolution that is based on people exercising creativity in the midst of devastation is one of the great historical contributions of mankind.” So, let’s write about our lives, draw our dreams, sing our sorrows, plant gardens, cook for our neighbors, build rainwater harvesting systems and compost toilets, repair our clothes, and create culture to survive the hard times wherever and however we can.

Lastly, I want to acknowledge that our disabled and incarcerated loved ones have developed so much of the accumulated wisdom about how to stay physically, mentally, and spiritually well in confined spaces. It is the most historically oppressed people who can teach us how to build networks of mutual aid in the absence of state-provided services. Thank you for your wisdom and leadership. May you stay safe and may we honor your lives.

I hope these questions serve you well in the times ahead. I wrote these for myself based on what I know best serve me when I feel panicked, disconnected, or cooped up. The idea is to ask the questions, but not stress the answers. Life under (and—let’s be real—even before) COVID-19 is stressful enough without adding to the to-do list. What you need might be different. What questions would you add to the list?

Take care of you and Stay Healthy, Chaps!
-Kristi and Katie

That feeling you are experiencing is grief

4/2/2020

 
Picture
I posted this article two weeks ago.  It really spoke to me.  I was feeling quite down about my children's' sport season abruptly ending and was already down about the anticipation that I was not going to be able to go to church for Easter.  I commented on another person's Facebook about this and their response made me feel pretty dismissed.  As if me feeling disappointed was not allowed and that I need to find the positive or the silver lining in this.  That as the last thing I (or anyone grieving) wanted to hear.  When I read this article, it was the validation and permission I was needing.  It is OK to be sad or disappointed or mad or whatever feeling you are experiencing about whatever you are missing right now.  We should never judge what someone else is feeling because those feelings are real and it's their reality.  You do not have to agree but don't dismiss the person or the feeling.

Shortly after that the amazing Caty Broderick sent Kristi and I this article.  Again, it was about grief.  I talk to students a lot about grief.  We normally think of grief as death but often we need to grieve a marriage, moving, break-up, not making a team, friendship changes, normalcy, connection, etc. Often, we are able to make sense of our emotions when we are able to name them.  As the famous saying goes, "name it to tame it" or as Brene Brown's latest podcast said we need to grieve our old lives as we try to build this new life.  
​

Just last night a friend posted this article. Again, grief is rearing it's ugly head.  So while this is temporary and we know this will not be forever, I highly recommend that we all recognize our grief.  You could make a list of all that you are grieving right now.  You don't have to share it with anyone but just naming it can be so powerful.  Acknowledge it. Grieve it.  Then decide to set that aside and make the best of our situation.  I like to rip it up when I am done with it and throw it away.  It does not mean that those old feelings won't ever creep up again, but it allows me to visually purge that yuckiness that I no longer want to carry.

Stay Healthy, Chaps!
Katie & Kristi

Picture
Here are a few additional resources that you might find useful - 
Dell Med coping resources
211
HHS free mental health support counseling
Region 13 parent resources

    Archives

    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    December 2021
    October 2021
    August 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    October 2014
    September 2014
    August 2014

    Categories

    All

    RSS Feed

Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.